1. |
Blood constellation
05:17
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If I am singing in my room please don't make any noise I am trying to think
Scratching my floor will help me think
Biting my nails will help me think
Think of something else to do:
And I don't want these lights in my room
10s and 1s and creations that sparkle on your face
and carry a new perception that you have never seen you carve the personality out of your sex life- now we all have our own grievances about the modern age.
I saw a couple days fly past my room!
I could be outside cutting my flesh into a crossword, so I bashed my window until the pieces of glass lay strewn all over my bed and I writhed around until they cut a constellation into me: my bits and pieces everywhere, I bled into my home I'm home, I said!
And now I'm weak without my blood. Without meaning or metaphor for meaning. Angry at the stance you're taking, flushing out all the things in your head until you are just losing blood.
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2. |
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I saw my old house that we lived in taken apart.
I didn't recognise patterns on the walls that I solemnly stared at for 7 years.
Memories will keep their pace and silver swords are near to breaking down and sleep saves face but you're all that I've talked to.
As long as you can keep me safe you're all I've ever wanted. Please keep me warm and stroke my face and tell me I'm not miserable anymore.
I won't wake up with the concept of god as entity. I will stay here as the walls shape around me. I don't understand anything...
I felt as if I just stood still I knew they'd never see me.
But I hear a sound that sounds like death at least how I perceive it.
But grains of sand fall down the wall and hide themselves from people.
And you will never see them again
The walls are moving, can you see it too?
I am not... physical...anymore.
Feeling like a weakness in a wall won't breathe.
Won't make you better it won't take long to see this.
So raise your legs let me see underneath!
Raise your legs let me see underneath!
Raise your legs...
God is not an entity god is a string much like a tool, they are woven through a blanket or take up space in a room. Hiding in corners waiting to be unseen forever. The anticipation you feel to never be seen again is your own God, and the floor filtering lives of grains of sand help them to.
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3. |
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I'm waking up and smelling salt the world has gone but nothings left- of you or me so we're just singing until the night will carry our souls in.
I'm dumb, I'm drunk, I'm left alone just long enough to get the feeling- I'm doing something wrong by being here and not a place that I don't know
Sick and tired, I'm tired of rowing past the little bugs and small things.
We hold our breathes for fear we'll get soaked and know we're unobtainable.
In summer rain a humid heat is felt until we're all unwell.
But fear! but queer! enough we appear and sing until our hearts drive near!
Outside a bedroom,
it's always been a solitary light.
Shining through the curtains.
And I am just turning over... please let me rest soon...
It won't be easier to admit you've fucked up the part that mattered the most than to scale the underneath of the ocean looking for a reason to keep being.
And I will never come back to the place I lived with the intent to finish all of this mess.
I learned piano and then stopped playing for me to begin music and stop for 2 more years for fear that time will call me and find my skin.
I'm not a man but what if the people I don't know call me one?
I'm not prepared to exist for someone else yet!
There's nothing in the world that will make you better at this. You just have to do it yourself!
kittens with pink glittery socks on (for the first time) discover the beauty of feminity as the pink light shines on their skin.
I don't know how to make it clearer that I don't want to be you. My body is stiff and blind and I forgot how to move
You are not a real person. You're lying in the grass and securing your windows
You felt like they would get you so you made yourself transparent.
Metaphor can't work without a reason to
You create based on a self intent and mutilation in mind
I'm sorry I was rude to you, your skirt weaved between the skin of reality and the body of dreams.
I don't know how to protect you and I realize that now
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Maud Gone England, UK
This is my music project going from 2021 to who knows when, I hope you enjoy!
She/Her please!
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